It’s been said that dealing with an addiction is one of the most difficult things to deal with in life.
Being an addict surely isn’t easy. But watching your child deal with an addiction is extremely difficult to deal with.
As an addict, you have control. You make the choice of when to change or for how long you will live with that addiction.
But as a parent, you feel hopeless. The situation is beyond you. You’d even change places with your son and deal with the addiction yourself if it meant he could be free from it.
But you can’t. Your son is stuck.
And that is tormenting.
But just because you are experiencing a tormenting situation, doesn’t mean you have to be tormented. You can find hope and peace in your situation.
In fact, there are 3 ways you can experience hope and peace as a mother with a child stuck in an addiction.
Listen to Other People’s Stories
When we find ourselves in hopeless situations, one of the best ways to get encouraged is to hear about other people who overcame the same obstacles.
If you son is stuck in drugs or alcohol, you’re not alone. Did you know that Ben Affleck’s mom, Samuel L. Jackson’s mom, and Oprah’s mom were once in your shoes?
Those parents, along with countless others, walked the road of frustration, setbacks, and broken promises.
But today, they are proud moms with renewed hope and answered prayers.
Keep hope alive. You could be the next mom to experience the same victory they did.
Take God at His Word
The strongest, surest truth we have in this world is the Word of God. In it, He gives us hope and peace not just for spiritual things but for practical, daily living.
In it, He tells us something encouraging:
"Anything is possible if a person believes." (Mark 9:23, NLT)
The difficulty in watching our child live stuck in an addiction is that we begin to feel as though change is not possible. The broken promises, the short-lived sobrieties, and the constant failed attempts add up. The result is that we lose hope. We begin to believe that change isn’t possible.
And Jesus understood that we would all feel that way at times in life.
That’s why he tells us that anything is possible. Anything does not mean things we can still hope for. It doesn’t mean the things we think can happen. It means “anything.”
Your son is included in “anything.”
There is still hope. Change is possible. And this renewed hope can give you peace of mind.
Release the Regrets
It’s hard to find peace for our present and hope for our future when looking at life in the rearview mirror.
The tendency for parents with children struggling through addictions is to analyze themselves for what they did wrong.
Some points are valid. But more often than not, we become overly critical of ourselves in an effort to make sense of why our children are using drugs and alcohol.
This leads to regrets that rob us of our peace.
Whether what we feel we did wrong is valid or not, the result is still the same. We blame ourselves for our children’s condition.
The key to overcoming this dilemma is to forgive yourself and release the regrets that weigh you down.
God’s word encourages us here:
“let us strip off every weight that slows us down [...] And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” (Hebrews 12:1, NLT)
Regret is a weight. Forgiveness is what strips it off of us.
Forgive yourself for the things you did (and didn’t do) AND for the things you’ve told yourself are your fault but actually are not.
It is time for you to have peace. And to have it, you must strip off the regrets of the past.
Your situation is not hopeless. It hurts. But change is possible.
By listening to other people’s stories of success, you will keep hope alive. God’s word will put peace in your heart. And releasing the regrets that rob hope and peace will keep them both alive.
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