An Honest Addict: How Addiction is Ruining My Family
"I'm only hurting myself," a constant refrain of addicts, contains a huge lie. A more truthful statement would be, "Not only am I hurting myself, but I'm also ruining my family. I'm inflicting harm on my children, and there's a good chance my spouse will leave me."
The truth might sound like this: "I am causing my parents more pain than they have ever experienced. They cannot count on me. I break their hearts. They spend a lot of energy and money getting me out of trouble. They're worried about my future more than I am. It's causing stress on their marriage and causing harm to my brothers and sisters."
Deep down the addict is aware the addiction is ruining his or her family, but users are excellent at self-delusion.
An Honest Addict
If you are addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling, pornography, or anything else, here is what should replace the lie of "I'm not hurting anyone":
"My addiction is ruining my family. My family cannot count on me to do what I say I'm going to do. My word means nothing to them. I am distracted and focused on how to get drugs and neglect things I need to do to help my family. I lie and steal to buy what I need.
"I am doing poorly at school. I might get fired from my job. I do a lot of things that bring shame on my family because of my addiction. I care more about my addiction than I do about my family. I care more about my addiction than I do about their breaking hearts. I hear their sobs, but I obey my addiction."
Getting an addict to examine the cost of his or her addiction, regarding how it hurts the family, may serve as motivation for the addicted seeking help.
Support groups exist for addicts and families of addicts.
You don't have to face this alone.